Naive, gullible – That’s Me

I have always been very naive.

Gullible.

Too trusting.

Stupid, even. And, I don’t say this lightly, so let it sit for a while.

Stupid, even.

I can’t imagine why anyone would deliberately undermine me. Especially not someone I interact with every day. Someone I consider a trusted friend or colleague.

When something happens to shake my trust in the world, I shrink back. I enclose myself in a protective shield. Then, because it’s exhausting or because it feels safe again, I start trusting again and I do something to expose myself once more.

And I never learn my lesson. At least I haven’t learned it, yet.

So, it’s no wonder that when I think I can trust someone, I find out that the opposite is true. But then it’s too late: I’ve bared my soul. I’ve made myself vulnerable.

I can’t seem to find a middle ground.

This situation feeds on my self-confidence.

So, wouldn’t it be better if I stayed in the shadows? Hidden? Not saying anything? Protecting myself? Redirecting my energies elsewhere?

Wouldn’t it be better?

Two Writing Teachers Tuesday Slice of Life Challenge

 

A Revelation

I had a revelation this afternoon

You know. One of those aha! moments that is only possible when I write. When I take the time to reflect and write on what’s happening around me, it will come. That revelation. That aha! moment. That sense of: “Duh! But of course! Why didn’t I see that before?”

So, what I realized today, as I was writing in one of my many notebooks, was that a recurring theme in my writing is about organization, routines, and habits. How to get organized. What to do first, second, third. When to do that and for how long. What are some good routines and how I can stick with them. What habits do I want to change, eliminate, and/or replace with better, more productive ones?

And, in all of this writing and thinking, it occurred to me that I spend too much time perseverating about how to change this and that…instead of changing this and that. When I’m done perseverating (or in this case, writing), I have very little energy left to actually carry out the new organization plan, routine or habit.

What should I do, then? I will find other topics to write about. No more writing about organization and developing a writing habit. I will not spend my precious time coming up with a rigid plan for how to get there that is bound to backfire. No. I’m done with that.

Now, I’ve got to come up with a viable list of topics for writing. Just like I encourage my students to do. I’ve been in a writing rut and I will pull myself out by venturing outside my comfort zone and exploring other topics. Some will be topics that I have been avoiding because they’re too painful or not easy to think about.

But, I have no other choice. I’m excited to begin this journey in earnest.

Cross posted to the Two Writing Teachers Slice of Life Tuesday.

 

I am a teacher

I am a teacher.

I touch minds and hearts.

I work hard, long hours, especially during the summer.

I am a teacher.

I love what I do even when no one notices.

As I inch towards the end of my teaching career (I can’t imagine not teaching so I can’t think about retirement, yet), I have no regrets that this is what I chose to do with my life.

I’d do it all over again if I could.

And, I wish I could.

I am a teacher.

I’ve had the privilege of hanging out with quirky, unpredictable, smart and kind kids for most of my life.

Even though I’ve been teaching for over 30 years, I am forever becoming a teacher.

There is no magic wand to get it right. Whatever that means.

It’s only me and my students.

Sometimes we work well together and sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we apologize and promise to do better.

Sometimes we laugh and work hard.

I am a teacher.

Cross posted to Two Writing Teachers Slide of Life Tuesday.

What Went Well…What Didn’t Go Well..

What went well today in our classroom:

  • Children sharing in jigsaw groups what they have been learning about one of the six regions of Canada.
  • Children writing headlines (a visible thinking routine) to highlight something interesting or important about a region of Canada that someone else shared.
  • Conversations around division: does the larger number always appear first in a division problem? When a smaller number is divided by a larger number is the answer a negative number?
  • Using the pictures from The Mysteries of Harris Burdick to spark writing during our 5 minutes of silent writing.
  • Starting to set norms around more effective conversations in class: wait a few seconds after someone has spoken; say something before having your say.
  • Dictation of a simple Spanish poem: what sounds/words are my students hearing when they listen to Spanish? How are they translating that into writing?
  • Weekly status of the class preceded by 3 minutes of writing to these two prompts: I am at the part where…I’m thinking…
  • I’m spending less time giving instructions so kids can work.

What didn’t go well today in our classroom:

  • I’m having a hard time sticking to my time limits.
  • Because I have too many tabs open, it takes me a long time to find what I need when I need it.
  • I still talk too much.
  • I’m not consistent with guidelines for group discussions.
  • I could make better use of my prep time.

Plans for improving tomorrow:

  • Set a timer for mini lessons.
  • Do even more turn and talk.
  • Enforce guidelines for group discussions.
  • Push all my open tabs to One Tab.
  • Stay positive.

Cross posted to Two Writing Teachers Slice of Life Tuesday.

 

Silent Writing Time – 5 minutes every day

Every day, at the beginning of writing workshop, we have a 5-minute silent writing time. Sometimes, I do a mini lesson first and sometimes, we just do 5 minutes of silent writing. Afterwards, the kids go off to work on their own writing projects.

Most days I’ve given my students free reign about what they are going to write during the silent writing time. But I’ve also provided a suggestion or two, such as a word of the day, for those kids who always seem to struggle with topic choice.

Some kids, who love to write and would write all day if I let them, have done fine with the freedom and the unstructured time.

Others have floundered.

Even though I know this is happening, I soldiered on. I figured that eventually they would write something. Most of the time, this approach has worked. However, I’ve ignored when it hasn’t worked more times that I would like to admit.

Then, I rediscovered Linda Rief’s quick writes book. I don’t own the original book or the new one that was published recently. I’ve wanted to purchase them, but wondered if the excerpts and suggestions would work with my grade 5 students; I know Linda teaches middle school. So I downloaded a sample chapter from the Heinemann website to give it a try.

The last couple of days have been quite a revelation.

My students have written more in the last two days during silent writing time and more of them have voluntarily shared their writing with the class than ever before. And, many more are engaged during the silent writing time; where they would groan, now they are engaged. Although some are still trying to figure out what the prompts are asking them to do, they are more likely to write something instead of leaving the page blank.

So, what changed? I think the biggest change is that previously students wrote alone during silent writing time. They did not have a partner to lean on or talk to about their writing.  So, they didn’t know where to start. Also, their writing during this time was not anchored to anything important to them. Now, the writing they do is anchored to  someone else’s writing. They now have a writing partner, just one they’ve never met.

Today, this led to storytelling and more writing. Today more and more kids not only read what they wrote, but also told stories related to the suggestions offered in the book. In fact, the energy in the room shifted. The children were starting to feel the power of their words: their writing was having a visible impact on their classmates who laughed and gasped during share time.

I can’t wait to do this again tomorrow.

Thank you Linda Rief!

Crossposted to Two Writing Teachers Slice of Life Tuesday.

Musings on a Tuesday Evening

I am caught between a rock and a hard place…of my own doing.

I have made it my mission to say, “Yes. Then, let’s talk about how it went,” when students ask me, “Can I…” or “Am I allowed to…”(This last one really grates on me, for some reason. But that’s a post for another time.)

Nevertheless, I find myself still saying, “No,” more often than “Yes”. I find myself waffling rather than assenting clearly and with confidence: “Yes. Try that out and then let’s chat about how it went for you.”

The classroom is a busy place. My students crave validation, permission, reassurance. They depend on me, as the adult in the room, to tell them I like their work. That they can use the iPad for writing and that what they’re doing, if not awesome already, is on its way to getting there. And, they are persistent.

But what am I after?

I look out at the sea of faces in my classroom and I am on a quest to identify learners who are independent, confident, and intentional problem solvers.

What I sometimes forget is that if my students are going to go from point a to point b, I need to create the situations to help them get there, one step at a time. And, it does take time.

When I explain the why of what we’re doing as clearly as possible without being wordy. (I’ve been told by some of my students that I talk a lot. I wasn’t surprised. I was hoping that they wouldn’t notice. LOL! You can be sure that I made a point of changing that the very next day.)

One way I’ve done this is to use the following sentence frame:

We are studying (topic/concept/skill) so that (how is this going to help us learn better/do something we want to do/improve in a particular area/skill, etc). 

This is not intended so that the teacher is the only one providing the why of a lesson or a unit. Ideally, we want our students to be thinking about this, too.

Today a student came up to me and told me about how she had discussed her reading goal with her parents last night and, as a result, had created a calendar of sorts to help keep her on track. This was not a requirement; she was motivated to do this on her own so that she could keep track of her goal. Tomorrow she’s going to share this with the class.

So, I have to ask myself: why was she self-motivated? Was she the only one or were other kids who were also motivated to follow up on their goals? When I talked to two students today, they were clear about their goals and how they were going to approach them. They have given this some thought.

The sentence frame I used for this was:

I will (goal) by (date or time frame) so that (how is this going to help us learn better/do something we want to do/improve in a particular area/skill, etc.

Maybe it was the so what part of the frame that helped kids connect to their goals. Maybe it was the intentionality: I will…Or maybe it was committing to a date that helped them take this, more or less common classroom exercise, seriously.

Only time will tell.

Stay tuned.

Cross posted to The Two Writing Teachers Slice of Life Tuesday.

 

 

 

A Philosophical Rumination

One day, as you’re getting on with your life and everything seems great, everything could change.

It happens on TV and it happens in real life.

I think about the families crossing the border. Hoping for asylum. Thinking they are getting a fresh start on life. Then…separation…cages…despair.

I think about the thousands of refugees who braved an entire ocean, or more, in search of a better life and…never made it.

I think about young, black boys and men. Walking while black. Playing while black. Running while black. Their lives gone. Their families changed forever.

I think about young indigenous girls and women. Dead. An epidemic. Families and entire communities impacted forever. We don’t yet know in how many ways.

These are all life-changing events. I’ve experienced life-changing moments in my life, both positive and negative, as I’m sure many of you have as well. No one can claim to be worse off than anyone else. It’s really all relative. Yet, there they are. Those larger than life moments that mark our lives forever.

I’m trying to accept that no matter how much we prepare for difficult moments, they can sneak up on us. Without warning. Catching us as we try to get on with our lives. So, instead of worrying or imagining the worst case scenario, it’s better to let go and live as if.

As if tomorrow will bring pleasant surprises.

As if time with family and friends is the only thing that matters.

As if everyone is doing their very best even with constraints and limitations.

As if what we do in our lives matters.

As if everyone we come in contact with will be enriched by whatever we have to offer.

As if there’s no tomorrow

and

as if tomorrow is all there is.

Cross posted to The Two Writing Teachers Slice of Life Tuesday.